Darling girl,

We decided we wanted you in our life as soon as we moved to Tasmania. A little Tasmanian baby, just like your daddy. The pregnancy was lovely. Not too many aches or pains and lots of lovely kicks and hiccups. I was always busy, chasing your big sister or flying to Melbourne for work. We were always moving… perhaps that’s why you like to move around so much now? Halfway through the pregnancy we decided that you needed to be born at home, surrounded by love and music and warmth and water.

You moved into a position ready for birth quite early. We thought you might come a week or two earlier than expected! Maree came to stay with us a week before your due date and we spent many afternoons drinking cups of tea and wondering when you would arrive. My stomach began tightening rather regularly every afternoon for a couple of weeks. I had contractions closer and closer together until one Tuesday night we were sure you were on your way. Then all of a sudden, everything stopped and we headed off to bed again. Another night without you in our arms. We were tired and feeling a little grumpy by now. We so longed to meet you and if you stayed inside too much longer we may not have been able to have the birth experience we hoped for.

One cold and drizzly Thursday morning, ten days after your due date, I woke up feeling contractions again. These were strong and intense and seemed to be getting faster. I had a shower and played with Audrey for a while. Your dad noticed that I was slowly dancing and swaying around the room and realised something was happening. We were a little excited, but didn’t want to get our hopes up until we knew for sure that you were on the way. The contractions stayed regular and I started to dance with your daddy. I needed his support and strength more and more. At 9am we called the midwife. She had become like a part of the family. Audrey was very fond of her and she could tell by my voice that we’d need her soon. We started to fill the pool in the dining room. I wasn’t sure how the water would feel, or if I’d want to stay in there for your birth, but I was keen to try…

When the midwife arrived we put on some music and the dancing continued. We danced behind the couch, looking out the window for a few hours. We had lunch, talked and laughed while Audrey played and Maree made more cups of tea. After lunch the midwife gave me the ok to hop into the water. It felt like a warm hug. Your dad decided to hop in too. He pressed on my back firmly but gently and gave such fantastic support. The music played, the windows steamed up and things became more intense. Your dad stood up to find a comfortable position and between contractions I shouted “sit down and press on my back!!” Willie Nelson sang “ohh, ohh deepwater…” and I groaned “ooohhhh” right along with him. “Pushing!!” I shouted. It felt good and strong and painful all at once.

Audrey woke up from her nap at about this time. “What’s going on?” she asked. Maree picked her up and gave her a big hug and I felt a pop as my waters broke. I felt a little bit of your head and a tuft of soft baby-fine hair swishing in the water. I felt your dad’s hand as I pushed and he said “I can feel the head”. The room was electric. There was so much energy and excitement coming from each person there. I felt like there was a little extra energy coming from the corner of the room too. Maybe it was the love and excitement of other family members and friends who couldn’t be there…?

You landed right into your daddy’s arms. What a surprise!! He passed you through my legs and the midwife unwrapped the cord from your neck as I brought you to the surface. You were a little blue and covered in vernix. We gazed at you like you were a little gift before unwrapping you and laughing as we discovered you were a girl. I suspect your dad’s laugh was relief – just what he had hoped for!! Audrey tentatively came and stood beside us and then hopped in the pool to say hello and have a cuddle. “Hello baby sister” she said. Your colour changed gradually and Audrey announced “She’s my favourite colour! I love pink!!” Then she asked “where’s the placenta?” The placenta was big and healthy. After your cord stopped pulsating, your daddy cut it and we moved to the lounge room for more cuddles and your first feed. You knew just what to do right from the beginning and it felt so good to be finally holding you!!

We suggested a couple of names and we all decided we liked Xanthe best, although Audrey called you “Fancy” for a couple of days. Labour had lasted 6 hours. I had no tears and I felt quite my old self in a matter of days. We had milo and crumpets and dinner in bed that night while you fed and we all gazed at you and breathed in your yummy newborn baby smells. Maree stayed to look after us all for a week, even though Paree missed her terribly. The house was warm and smelled beautiful, full of flowers and sunshine. Not what you’d expect for the middle of a Tasmanian winter! It was a beautiful beginning little one. May your days always be full of flowers and sunshine.

Love Mummy.XXX